[xx Leila xx]

here ya are!

Amie and I were both sitting by Matt’s bed in silence. Only two chairs were in the room, so I was in Deryck’s lap.
I had finally been discharged from the hospital two days ago, but after a quick trip home to shower and get some clothes, I had gone right back and hadn’t left since.
Matt had been in the hospital for two days, and he didn’t seem to be getting any better. He didn’t talk, just slept. I was trying not to get discouraged, though. The doctors had said the blood and memory loss were both minimal, and aside from a concussion, he’d be fine. I guess the blood looked like there was a lot more than there was.
I leaned back in Deryck’s lap a little. I was just sitting there, not really doing much.
Deryck leaned close to me ear and whispered, “Av.” I turned around to look him in the eye. I didn’t say anything. I just waited for him to say whatever he had gotten my attention for.
“Are you okay?” Deryck asked me gently, for the second time that day. “You haven’t talked in hours,” he persisted.
I nodded. “I’ll be fine. I’m not even the one who’s hurt,” I said softly. I felt tears about to break out, and I had to bite my lip to keep myself in control. My eyes were starting to water.
Matt looked so helpless lying there in front of me. I looked at Amie and saw that she was about to cry too.
“Amie, I’m so sorry,” I blurted out. “He got hurt for me. I’m sorry.” I bit down even harder on my lip, and the salty taste of blood filled my mouth.
Deryck handed me a tissue. I gently pressed it against the inside of my lip, but I hardly noticed it. I was focused on Amie.
“Is that why you’re being so quiet?” asked Amie in surprise. She leaned over and put her hand on my knee. “It’s not your fault at all. Don’t feel bad,” Amie assured me. Amie always talks softly, and she has a strangely sweet, reassuring quality to her voice. It usually works on me like a charm. But this time I was surprised.
“Really?” I asked. My shock was apparent in my voice. Amie hadn’t talked much either, although she had certainly been talking more than me, but I had assumed it was because she was mad at me.
“I’m not mad at you,” Amie said, raising her eyebrows. I felt really creepy all of a sudden, like Amie had read my mind. I didn’t answer.
“Seriously,” she insisted. “Lighten up, okay?” pleaded Amie, sounding almost desperate. “It’s hard for me to be around you when you’re brooding all the time.”
“Alright,” I muttered. I was starting to feel awkward. I wanted to get out.
“I think I need some fresh air,” I decided out loud, rising from Deryck’s lap and stretching. I hadn’t stood up since I’d had to use to bathroom about six hours ago. I looked at my husband. “Der, could you come with me?”
“Sure,” smiled Deryck.