[bunny]

^^ya bet

lol and yes an other long update (I might get used to that, does someone mind?)

‘’Avril, I wasn’t meant to hurt you.’’ I said crying. ‘’I just wanted you to listen to what I have to say.’’ But it didn’t matter what I tried to stop her crying. She just sat there, crying like she had done before. Crying the way she did when she was tired of it. Tired of live, tired of herself. She was tired of me, I never should have come in the first place. I sat down the other side of the kitchen. Crying, all I had ever hoped for was broken. Broken by my own hands.

‘’avril please give me a moment to explain.’’ I said while crying. ‘’All you see are the wrong things. You don’t even let me explain.’’

But she didn’t react. She just sat there, with her arms around her legs. Trying to make as less sound as she could while crying. She hated to cry, show what she feels. She just hated if people knew she was hurt sharing her emotion.

‘’Avril, I am sorry that I hit you.’’ I felt desperate, there was no way I could make this up and I knew it. ‘’Please stop crying…’’ As the words came out I started to cry even more, so did she. I wished she would say something yell at me, tell me what was going through her mind. But she didn’t. She never had been easy with these things. And I knew this wouldn’t get any more easy. I stood up and walked to Avril and bent down.

‘’You my cry, you may hate me. But please just let me love you I don’t care you hate me. But I need you.’’ I wanted to say more. I wanted to beg her to love me back. But it would be un fear. How could someone love you while you have hit her just minutes ago.

‘’Tring!’’

Damn it the door bell. This was like the worst time in history. Avril had finally stopped crying so I thought about having a better chance talking to her. I put my hand on her back.

‘’I’ll open, just stay here would you? I really want to talk to you.’’

She nobbed something, which was at least something. Then I slow stood up and made my way to the door. Avril’s head was not between her arms and legs any more and she watched me while I walked to the front door. She finally stopped crying and gave a reaction to me. I wished I could just turn and go back to her to talk.

‘’Tring’’

I walked toward the door and opened it

‘’WHAT!’’ I yelled. Then I saw Jim and Petra standing in front of me.

‘’I’ve forgot the…..’’ Before she could finish her line she looked away with a red head. Jim stood smiling at me looking like a complete fool.

‘’Deryck, I think your all hot and stuff, but uhm….you might put on some clothes.’’

Jim burst in laughing while looking at me. While Petra stood there shy with a read head looking down.

‘’What?’’

I turned and looked at the mirror next to me.

‘’SHIT!’’ I yelled when I noticed I was wearing nothing more then one sock at my left feet.

‘’You might close the door, we don’t want these little four year old girls to have a trauma..’’

A few little girls looked at me while there mothers tried covered there eyes. Jim took it over and took the door and closed it in front of me. A little self socked I stood behind the door. I could hear someone giggle, which only could be only Avril. But when I looked at he she tried to hide away the big grin on her face. Tears were still on her cheeks but at least she could smile. I turned and made my way back upstairs. My head was probably red from shame. But it didn’t matter I just made a complete fool out of myself. I have made Avril smile. Between her tears I had seen a smile, a perfect smile which had came out of nothing but joy.