I found this to be hilarious!
Her driver’s license application will be on display in all DMV locations
SACRAMENTO, CALIF. – May 19, 2008 – The California Department of Motor Vehicles has never been known as the most user-friendly agency in the state, but at least it doesn’t shy away from giving credit where credit is due. On Friday, May 30, it will unveil a 9-foot-by-12-foot replica of the driver’s license application filled out in April by pop singer Avril Lavigne.
Calling it the “worst, most brutalized and aborted application ever submitted in the long and storied history of the California DMV,” director Ed Brussels said the DMV will use Lavigne’s application as a motivational tool for other first-time licensees.
“The state of California has a very high number of Hispanic and Asian citizens, many of whom have never driven but want to, and many of whom are not native speakers of English,” Brussels said on Monday. “By hanging Ms. Lavigne’s application in every DMV location, we’ll encourage these citizens to not be intimidated by our application process. We’ll show them that if she can do it, anybody can do it.”
Brussels, who has worked in varying capacities for the department for 27 years, said that as soon as Lavigne turned in her application on April 4 at the Van Nuys office, staff there immediately forwarded it to him in Sacramento.
“Well, not immediately,” Brussels corrected himself. “The staff had to wait until they were coherent again after laughing and rolling around on the floor for about thirty minutes.”
The creation of the poster of Lavigne’s application was handled by Sherwin Adams & Associates, a Fresno public relations firm specializing in the music industry and services for the mentally handicapped. Titled “Don’t Do This!” the poster will show both sides of the application surrounded by turquoise flowers.
“We thought it was a nice touch,” Brussels said, “seeing as her trademark color is turquoise.”
When told that Lavigne’s trademark color is pink, Brussels said, “Well, if she wants to change the poster, we’re going to need to do another eye check and have her step over to line 45 and take a number.”
Lavigne, recuperating from laryngitis in her hometown of Napanee, Ontario, Canada, was thrilled to hear the news.
“This is so great for me, because people who might not have ever heard of me will get to know who I am,” she said Monday. “All those Mexicans and whatever else, they come from countries that a lot of times don’t even have running toilets. Well now they’ll know my name and can go right out after they get their driver’s license and buy my CDs!”
Added Lavigne, “It was my first application for a license, even though I’ve been driving in California for years without one. I really like California. They have a ton of cool stores.”
Here is a reformatted version of the first page of Lavigne’s driver’s license application.
NAME Avril Ramona Lavigne
ADDRESS Street It’s a drive, actually
Box# That’s privit!
City Beverly Hils
AGE 1984
PLACE OF BIRTH In bed in a hospidal
MARITAL STATUS married to deryck whitley of SUM 41
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CONVICTED OF A FELONY? Lots of times. You mean like shoplifting?
IF YES, PLEASE EXPLAIN Okay well me and my homies when i was like 12 we went in this departmint store and tried to steal a manacken. Cops came and we split but they found us cause everybody said Oh it’s that ho girl who plays the gitar that did it. They gave me a ticket for obstruckting a manaken or something.
IS THIS YOUR FIRST CALIFORNIA DRIVER’S LICENSE APPLICATION? No i messed up three of them and put them in the trash. So this is my fifth.
ARE YOU CURRENTLY LICENSED TO DRIVE IN ANY STATE? Not sure what this questian means because it could impare my culpability.
OCCUPATION Best damn thing
EMPLOYER RCA records
ESTIMATED YEARLY INCOME 25 million but it would have bene more if it werent for my ripoff producer who took 18% off the top.
DO YOU CURRENTLY OWN A VEHICLE? Yes i own a lot. What i mean is i own many not a car lot.
MAKE 2007
MODEL SUV
COLOR Hot pink
YEAR ?
WERE YOU GIVEN A DMV HANDBOOK ON YOUR FIRST VISIT TO THIS OFFICE? No i only came in here to get direxions to Olive Garden. i got one of those books from the drumer in my band. He said it was hard and i said i heard it was easy then i realized he wasnt talking about the book.
DO YOU WEAR GLASSES? Only in public
IF YOUR EYE EXAM SHOWS YOU NEED CORRECTIVE LENSES, ARE YOU PREPARED TO ACQUIRE THEM? If its necessary I guess i can. What ecactly do you mean by “corective lenses”? And “acquire”?
PERSON TO CONTACT IN CASE OF EMERGENCY DURING BEHIND-THE-WHEEL PORTION OF THE TEST My agent Jim Thrubber. Dont bother calling cause he doesnt even answer for me. You can write to him Morganstein Thrubber Entertainment at 1990 west Ventura Bld. Sweet 200. It might be 1890 i can’t remember. It’s the building with all the flags hanging out front and theres this drunk woman who stands out front a lot and asks for spare change. Im just curious what kind of emergency their could be with me driving? Should i wear protective gear or a cup?
Source:
Avril Lavigne To Be Recognized By California DMV « StarStories