Born For This (Avril) - Avril Lavigne Bandaids: The Best Damn Avril Lavigne Fansite

waitingxforxyou · 08-07-2007, 11:44 PM

After not writing for months, let's see if I can still do this.

Born For This

Chapter One

Have you ever noticed how much we rely on words? Or have you never really thought about it?

You’re probably the latter. The truth is, as much as we use words every day, we seldom focus on the meaning behind them, or if they’re true at all. We’re more content with our empty facades that may or may not have any validity to them. Sometimes, we don’t even care about actions; “actions speak louder than words” is such a crock of shit.

Because let’s face it, when you’re insecure and desperately searching for comfort, words just seem to gloss everything over, whether you realize it or not.

There are monumental words that certainly stroke a chord. “I love you.” “I’m sorry.” “It’s a boy/girl!”

But there are others that you wish you never had to hear.

This is what I’m thinking as I’m sitting on the black leather couch in Avril Lavigne’s house. She’s pacing the length of the living room, which means she has plenty of room to pace. The room takes up the whole eastern side of the huge house. Lined with windows, the afternoon sun is slowly sliding down in the sky, casting long shadows.

It’s best that way. The shadows hide my eye-rolling and frequent glances at the plasma television screen, where yet another brat is wailing about a BMW on My Super Sweet Sixteen.

“I think he’s cheating on me,” Avril says, her chin nestled in the crook of her thumb and forefinger. Well, those are some monumental words.

Insert eye roll. “What makes you say that?”

“He’s just been acting strange lately.”

“This is the guy who threw condoms full of spoiled milk out of a hotel balcony. Just what else does have to do for you to call him ‘strange’?”

Avril does a weird jerking motion with her hand. “Never mind that. You know what I mean.”

“Not yet.” I peer at the television. There’s a Cinderella-themed party going on. I always wanted a sweet sixteen party.

“…so that’s one thing!” Avril pauses in front of the screen. She tosses her long blonde hair over her shoulder.

Clearly I’m expected to come up with a reply. Dammit, I knew I should’ve been paying attention. I’m about to spout off some nonsense when I look at her, really look at her.

She’s dressed simply in a green t-shirt and plain denim jeans. Her feet are bare, as is her face of make-up. Her blue eyes are pleading for some helpful feedback.

I don’t want to spit out something. I like Avril, I really do. She’s as much a friend to me as she can be, considering the circumstances.

“Why don’t you tell what other kind of strange behavior he’s exhibiting, and I’ll tell you my honest opinion.”

“Okay.” Avril settles herself next to me on the couch. “First of all, he’s been ‘working late’ for weeks. But he never has anything to say about it! No conversation about any of the new material, which makes me think there isn’t any.”

“Is that all?”

“Second.” Avril ticks off another point on her fingers. “One night he came home smelling like cheap perfume.”

A laugh escapes me before I can shove it back down.

Avril frowns, her thin brows coming together. “What’s so funny about that?”

“Because I can’t tell if you’re serious or just quoting one of your song lyrics.”

“My song—oh. Oh. She hums some of the “Everything Back But You” and laughs as well. “He seriously did though!”

“Okay. Next clue?”

“Well, Deryck and Evan have been hanging out a lot, but when I asked Evan about Deryck’s behavior, he was silent about it.”

“That solves it then.” I clasp my hands. “Obviously Deryck and Evan are having a clandestine love affair.”

Avril’s frown depends. “Hey, that’s not funny! They’re not gay!”

I raise my eyebrows in confusion. “Evan isn’t gay? I always thought he was…”

“What would make you think that?”

“He spends more time on his hair than I do.”

“So does half of the world. Does that make billions of people gay too?”

I’m convinced there’s an insult in there somewhere, but I don’t pursue it. “Listen, Av.” I pat the spot beside me and she scoots in closer. “I’m sure there’s a reasonable explanation for all of this. Deryck’s totally in love with you, why would he cheat? It wouldn’t make sense.”

“Cheating never makes sense.” Avril leans back. “I don’t even know what to think or do.”

I angle my body towards her. “For the first thing, maybe he’s working so hard that he’s stressed out. If he’s stressed out about the new music, why would he want to talk about all the drama when he comes home to relax? For the second thing, there are women who work at the studio, women at his record label, etc. If one of them slathered on perfume like it was sunscreen, it could stick to him from a mile away. Lastly, about Evan, he probably feels like he shouldn’t discuss Deryck’s business with you.”

“Hm.” Avril taps her chin with her forefinger. “That adds up, I guess…”

“Besides, you could always ask Pyramid.”

“Who?”

“Triangle?”

“Hayley, who the hell are you talking about?”

“That…guy…” I screw up my face in concentration; why won’t the name come to me? “The dude in Deryck’s band? With the geometrical nickname?”

“Do you mean Cone?” Avril bursts out laughing. “Only you, only you would mess that up…you always know how to make a situation seem not so bad.”

“That’s because, honestly, most situations aren’t so bad.”

“That’s true. You’re right, it’s not so bad. I’ll just ask Cone. Deryck would never cheat. Anyways!” Avril grabs the remote up from the coffee table. “Let’s watch something.”

“Alright. I’ll make some popcorn.” I stand and Avril smiles up at me.

“Oh Hayley, you’re such a good friend! What would I do without you?” she says wistfully.

I smile weakly back. If only she knew, I think, if only she knew who I am and what I’m planning to do.