Long time coming

[Morenor]

o-oh.. what is in the letter haha

Good one..

[Seyary_Minamoto]

What does it say?

[angie17]

well you´ll have to wait until the next update to find out and I want lots of comments...

and I can guarantee you that you will hate one person after the next update!

[Morenor]

UPDATE UPDATE

[angie17]

I´ll update if I get two more comments!

[Vintage Beats]

updateeeeeeeeeeee

[angie17]

just one tiny comment and I will!

[Pretty Reckless]

Update or I'll beat you!

[Morenor]

hey phhsst.... Update

[angie17]

Originally Posted by Suzee

Update or I'll beat you!

hey, don`t threaten me...

I`m just writing an update!

[angie17]

upate coming in three minutes!

[angie17]

“Dear Michelle,

You’re probably asking yourself why I’m writing you a letter. It’s true; I could have called you as well (but I thought maybe one of your parents would answer and I didn’t know what you’ve already told them about me, so I decided to write you a letter – also because in this way I can express myself probably better than in any other way).

I know I owe you some explanations but I can’t give you them right now although I know you must be having a difficult time right now… and it’s probably partly my fault.

When you told me about you having a baby, it was the last thing I would have expected to hear from you. It just made me feel as if something came up in my life at a point of time I clearly wasn’t ready for it. I know it sounds a bit lame as it is you who is going to be having a baby and not me and I think you weren’t planning on this to happen either.
As weird as it may sound, I feel like if I stayed with you I would make the situation even more difficult than it already is and I don’t want to confuse you or make you more insecure just because I feel that way.

I’m feeling like an idiot to tell you this and I don’t know if I won’t regret someday having said this but for now I think it’s best if I don’t interfere in your life anymore. I can’t really explain why; I only know that I’ve already caused you enough pain and problems and I feel I’m not good for you.

I can’t give you the support you need right now and the strong shoulder you are seeking to lean on. I hope that you find someone who is able to offer you all this, you deserve it – but that one just isn’t going to be me, you know…

Also, my family and me have moved city three weeks ago, that’s the reason why you haven’t seen my around anywhere lately.

The thing you’re probably gonna hate me most for is that I believe it’s best if I don’t give you my new address or phone number because I want you to get over me and start a new chapter in your life without me.

What I can’t predict is how I’ll look upon this whole thing in like 20 years or so. Maybe I’ll hate myself for it; maybe I’ll still think it had been the best solution, I can’t say…

If you should hate me even more now I can understand it, I just can’t see any other possibility than doing what I’m doing.

I am not asking you for forgiveness or something, you should just know that you’ll always remain part of my history and I’ll never forget you.

Probably I am a big coward that I’ve left you; I know that

I guess that’s all I wanted to say…

Kevin


After I had read the letter I didn’t know what to think or feel anymore, I had never experienced that feeling of a mix between anger, rage, loneliness, desperation and emptiness.
It was a bad feeling; maybe it wasn’t a feeling at all because these lines had left me numb and empty.
I just kept sitting on the staircase, elbows on my knees, head in my hands and hot tears were on their way down my face. They and the little baby inside of me were the only things at that moment that made me realize I was still alive.