To those familiar with Team America: World Police...

[banballow]

Ok, I was thinking at work today (Dangerous, I know!) that we need a sequel to Team America. I even came up with this little idea for how a second movie might work, bringing back all the favorites and there's even a montage included:
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The movie starts with a recap of what happened at the end of the first Team America. Gary storms Kim Jong Il's palace and rescues his friends. They stop the Film Actor's Guild and Kim Jong Il, and open the door to the room where Kim Jong Il has their vehicles stashed away. Team America jumps up and freezes in midair.

"Cut! That's a wrap! Nice job everybody!!!" The original Team America turns out to be a movie. (Gasp!) The cast gathers together and everybody congratulates each other on a job well done. Most of the congratulations though, go to Matt Damon, who everybody agrees stole the show. Nobody denies that Matt Damon will win an Oscar (Best Actor) for his performance.

Flash forward several months. All of Hollywood has gathered for the Oscars, and the Film Actor's Guild is present, supporting Matt Damon who has been nominated for Best Actor. (Naturally!) In a cruel twist of fate, the Oscar goes to Adam Sandler, leaving poor Matt Damon crushed.

Later at the Hall of the Film Actor's Guild... Alec Baldwin is irate at what has happened. Everybody knows that Matt Damon was the one that should have won that Oscar. Alec rallies all of the Film Actor's Guild together to make things right. They will get Matt Damon (Still distraught from the loss, he rocks back and forth in the corner, saying Matt Damon over and over.) his Oscar, by any means necessary.

A month later, a nuclear warhead is hijacked. America learns that the Film Actor's Guild is responsible, and that they demand the Best Actor Oscar be handed over to Matt Damon, or they will blow up something. America refuses to negotiate with the Film Actor's Guild, and decide to call in the only group that can possibly stop them... Team America.

And so for the first time in months, all of the actor's that had portrayed Team America found themselves back on the set. (Spotswood rolls out in his chair.)

"Good morning Team!"

Everybody is confused. The man who plays Spotswood explains what has happened up to this point. Matt Damon's loss at the Oscars... the Film Actor's Guild stealing the nuclear warhead.... their demands... and of course, how America needs them now more than ever. He explains that they're the only ones in the world that can stop the Film Actor's Guild.

Again, everybody is confused. They don't understand how they, a simple group of actors, can do anything. Spotswood explains that the only thing that can stop one group of actors, is an even better group of actors. Everybody says to forget it, that it's not possible. Spotswood doesn't give up though, and pulls out their original contracts, pointing out that they are contractually obligated for no less than one sequel.

Knowing that there's no way out, the team suits up and heads to France to stop the Film Actor's Guild. After a bit of searching, they find out that the Film Actor's Guild is hiding at the top of the Eiffel Tower. Approaching the base of the Tower, they are greeted by the group of Samuel L. Jackson, Helen Hunt and of course their leader Alec Baldwin. Team America tries to put up a fight, but are beaten fairly quick by their opponents. Helen Hunt asks if they should kill Team America, but Alec Baldwin says no, "They're no threat to us. This is real life, with no script. These "actors" can't improv worth a damn." Alec then goes over to "Gary" and kicks him in the side, he leans over and tells him "It's just like I told you the first time we met, you can't out-act me boy."

Team America wakes up days later at headquarters, battered and bruised. They ask Spotswood what they're supposed to do now, they can't stop them. Spotswood pulls up a recording of their defeat in France, and plays it back. He pauses it after Alec Baldwin's first set of remarks. He says that while they're a fine set of actors, Alec Baldwin's right, they can't do improv. Without a script, they're nothing like the old Team America, and don't stand a chance. If they hope to stop the Film Actor's Guild, the Team will have to learn to improv and fast. "Gary" can't believe what he's hearing, does Spotswood have any idea how long that would take?!

Spotswood asks "Gary" to think back to the first movie, when he needed to learn to fight in a hurry. "Gary" doesn't understand. Spotswood starts humming... think "Gary"! Still doesn't get it... Spotswood continues humming.

... mon...

... mon-tage?

"That's right Gary! Now hit the music!" A montage follows showing Team America learning the fine art of improv. With every scene, show a little improvement, 'cause to show it all would take to long... that's called a Montage! (Montage!)

Team America rushes back to France for the final showdown against the Film Actor's Guild. (By this point, yes, it's a race against the Ticking Crock!) They're met at the base of the Eiffel Tower by a group of novice Actors. They manage to improv their way past them, pretending they're gardeners. They start their ascent up to the top of the Eiffel Tower, dealing with Samuel L. Jackson and Helen Hunt along the way.

Finally they reach the top. Alec Baldwin is waiting for them, along with the nuclear weapon. Team America goes to stop Alec Baldwin, but he traps them in a tiny net. He then begins to explain why he's doing this. He asks them if they think it's fair that Adam Sandler won Best Actor? Don't they agree it should have been Matt Damon. Team America agrees that Damon should have won, total screwjob.

Alec asks them if they would like to see Matt Damon now... what's happened to him after all these months. Matt Damon walks out of the shadows, in one of those cheesy Phantom of the Opera masks.

"Matt Damon."

... (Removes mask.)

"Matt Damon."

Team America looks horrified, though when you see Matt Damon he looks exactly the same as always.
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... and that's about as far as I've gone. I'm not sure how, but Team America using their new improv skills to save the day. They kill Alec Baldwin, and turn Matt Damon to their side for the sequel.

[Prudence]

Lmao, we do need another one.

Matt Damon

[xtakemeawayx]

I think it would be funny to make a sequel of this movie. I loved it.

[Prudence]

*sings* Pearl Harbour sucks....and I miss you...