The Don't Let Me Get Me Support Group

[Once a Heavenly Creature]

It really is, isn' it?

Oh, and I completely forgot about my first job as well. That was just loads of fun. That was 2 years ago, when I was 15. I worked at a petstore, and everything was just swell for awhile. But then my boss and her daughter, who both worked there, started saying shit about me. They both basically called me a slut because I have big boobs. And appearantly "Many customers have noticed your chest and have commented about it." Now how does that make me feel? Do they really think I want attention for that? It's not like I went and had implants or anything... But I guess other people think it qualifies me as a slut.

Which, funny thing is, I haven't even had a fucking boyfriend yet. Which is another thing that has caused lots of depression. It's so hard to see every other girl my age with a guy, and here I am, with no one. I'm guessing it's because I look older than alot of the girls my age, and intimidate guys or something...But that doesn't make me feel any the less worthless.

[O Captain My Captain]

Youre 17, right?

[Once a Heavenly Creature]

Yeah. Lucky lucky haha.

[O Captain My Captain]

So lucky.

It must've been kind of ironic, since youve never had a BF, yet they called you a slut. And i dont think a slut would work at a pet store. Maybe it was a perverted pet store, since people werre staring at your boobs. Must've gotten kind of uncomfortable...

(trying to bring humor into this)

Oh and i really wouldnt worry about the BF thing. I mean, most highschool relationships are nothing anyways.

(do i sound too optimistic? being optimistic keeps me from going crazy. It seems like a good thing to spread. But if it gets annoying ill stfu)

[Once a Heavenly Creature]

People are just like that. They make assumptions from just looking at you. That is why I never judge a person by how they look. I have actually found the "weird" looking people, the "gothic" etc ones are alot nicer. Probably because they can relate more to people.

Dude, it was a perverted pet store I think...It scared the shit out of me to work all alone at night, and I had to ring up these creepy guys. I ended up just locking the door at night, because no way was I going to get killed or anything. But I got fired/quit anyways, so it's all good.

I know having a BF isn't the biggest deal in the world. It's a very petty problem I'm sure. It just makes me feel horrible to think that the only guys who like me are creepy old men...I've only been asked out by a Mexican guy like 10 years older than me, and some nerdy kid. I always get the nerdy kids haha.

Optimism is good. I try to be optimistic, but half of me is pessimistic as well.

[Prudence]

^that sucks, they sound like absolute bastards.
I hate people who judge people before they get to know them.

i havent had a boyfriend since 8th grade, and that was nothing - i'm basically one year out of school now, still don't have one.
I have the mentaliity to not go out looking as they will find me. Sorta thing, hasn't worked YET but i'm still banking on it.


Highschool relationships, like Amy said mean squat, you'll find someone one day who likes you for who you are. Trust me

[Remorseful]

God. Today is like the worst day of my life. I can't stop crying.
I wonder if I should end it all right now..

[pigster]

^^^^NOOOOO!!!!! As my one friend has told me from day one when I met her that the next day is always better. You guys I have been threw so much crap! It was horrible. I was a horrible person!!! I hated who I was. But I had 2 very very good friends that I truely believe God sent to me and the one friend helped me get out of the hole I was in and the other has helped me get even further away from that hole. I called her the other night to thank her for every thing she has done for me because Im so happy and proud of the person I have become, I have a great job a great family and great friends, And im just so proud of myself because I know I am a great person and I try to be the best I can be, But when I told her thank you for making me a better person she told me shes like you have always been a great person you just didnt believe in your self you didnt relise that you had it in you and she was like you just needed some one to show you and some one to be positive around you. And it was so true! We are all great people we just need to believe in ourselves!!!